ur-secret-admonisher said:Please elaborate
Ha. Where to start.
Women need to feel desired or desirable. Put bluntly, men want sex. That doesn’t make them pigs; however the way they choose to act out on that, can. Women understandably want to feel physically attractive to men…
The push (from the feminist movement) that women should be allowed to be ass naked in public is a radical display in order to prove a point. Equality is important. This is not an issue of self respect. We should all be allowed to be naked and not degraded or harmed for it. Does that mean I want us all to be out naked in public? no, not really- that’s not what this is about. It’s about not having to fear RAPE, VIOLENCE and HARASSMENT over it. Men do not face the same threat on a daily basis, why should we have to? If my boyfriend walked outside naked right now he would not feel that his body is in danger. If I walked outside naked I would immediately feel intimidated as a result of what history has shown, what men are capable of getting away with, and how often their behavior is excused. The statistics do not lie. It’s terrifying how regular it is to hear about rape. It is not required of the man to have self control. But it is for the woman. And that is what’s fucked up. I don’t understand how there are any women in existence who don’t find that sickeningly offensive.
Dressing scantily does not teach men to treat me like an object, dressing modestly does not teach men to treat me like a queen. If he is such a "visual creature" it is not going matter what I am wearing. He is going have his urges regardless. It’s up to him to chose how he behaves. Just like when I hate a persons guts, it’s up to me to chose whether or not I punch them in the face. You, as an individual, control how you treat people.
I am not hating on men. There are tons and tons of them that stand with us simply because it’s the right thing, which is awesome. It’s an extremely important subject that I do not take lightly.
Also. Premarital sex is a choice. I support it. But then again, I am not religious at all, so there is nothing conflicting with my views on that. There is no wrong or right here. It’s all a matter of what you believe. Marriage does not promise security or protection any more than it would have before the fact. It makes no difference. If that person is going to hurt you, they’re going to regardless. Sex Is a major part of any functional relationship, no it is not the center of it. But I do think it’s healthy for both people to know absolutely everything there is to know about each other and be content with it.. before making the jump to marriage. Just my belief. You can be in love, unmarried, and still have meaningful sex. Marriage is nothing but a legal document at the end of the day.
I do agree that the sexual aspect of a lot of relationships is abused. And that can certainly cause a lot of pain and heartbreak. But that is what you call an unhealthy relationship. There is not enough balance in the mix to sustain true love for one another. Instability, and a connection lacking in depth- both physically, mentally, and emotionally is doomed. There are many important things that make a relationship work properly, and when those things are left out, it inevitably invites trouble. You cannot blame that on the concept of premarital sex alone. It just doesn’t work like that.
I had to get that out there.